LEARN A WORD A DAY: NECROPHILIA

A man was brought before the judge and charged with NECROPHILIA (making love to a dead person).

The judge told him, "In 20 years on the bench, I've never heard such a disgusting, immoral thing. Just give me one good reason why I shouldn't lock you up and throw away the jail keys in the toilet?"

The man replied, "I'll give you THREE good reasons:

1. It's none of your damn business;
2. She was my wife; and.....
3. I didn't KNOW she was dead, she ALWAYS acted that way!"

SO LADIES TRY TO MOVE A LITTLE DURING THE GAME…..

GUYS, IF THERE IS NOT MUCH MOVEMENT, STOP IMMEDIATELY AND CHECK IF SHE IS ALIVE.

3 children are born every second in this world;
10 mobile phones sold on the international level;
auto manufacturers produce a car every 4.5 seconds on average;
and on the level of the human mind = brain cells send 200 directives each second
to perform the various functions of physical and mental health.
The world spends 37 million euros for arms on the international level in one second

And the Sultan of Brunei's wealth increases by 90 euros every second!

No envy please!

This means around 5400 euros per minute, 324000 euros each hour, 7776000 euros a day

Implies about 54432000 euros a week (that's 54 million and 432000 thousand euros)

Brunei's Sultan Hassanal Bolkiah ... President of the richest country in the world
Popular, lavish, ... uses gold in everything
Was born literally eating with spoons made of gold
Clothes worn embroidered with gold and silver

These are some pictures of his palace ...

The largest and most luxurious palace in the world...

Consists of 1788 rooms with some furnished in gold and diamond-encrusted
257 bath inlaid with gold and silver
and a garage to accommodate 110 cars
The palace has 650 suites ... each furnished at not less than 150,000 thousand euros
This requires the visitor to spend 24 hours just to inspect each room for 30 seconds

The Sultan of Brunei's plane

Most luxurious aircraft in the world, inlaid with gold
The Sultan has also a Boeing 747 worth a hundred million dollars,

and then re-designed as a home at a cost of more than one hundred and twenty million dollars.

Featured add-ons such as a whirlpool bath of pure gold
He also has six small aircraft and two helicopters.

One of the cars of theSultan of Brunei

At the special request of the Sultan of Brunei,

theRolls Royce company
combined their car designs with that of Porsche.
This vehicle is currently in London
for use during his stay in Britain

When the Sultan of Brunei's daughter married,

the legendarycelebrations continued for 14 days,

at a cost of about five million dollars,
attended by more than 25 heads of state and family members.

Sultan of Brunei car inlaid with pure gold

The Princess wears a crown of diamonds

and carries a small bouquet of flowers studded with diamonds.

She also wears huge diamonds as earrings, adding sparkle to her face.

Wikipediasays he has
531 Mercedes-Benzes
367 Ferraris
362 Bentleys
185 BMWs
177 Jaguars
160 Porsches
130 Rolls-Royces
And 20 Lamborghinis

Bringing the total number of his cars to 1,932

A Brilliant Conversation -in Godness with faith

An Atheist Professor of Philosophy was speaking to his Class on the problem Science has with GOD, the Almighty. He asked new Christian students to stand and...said Professor : You are a Christian, aren't you, son? Student : Yes, sir. Professor : So, you believe in GOD? Student : Absolutely, sir. Professor : Is GOD good? Student : Sure. Professor : Is GOD ALL - POWERFUL? Student : Yes. Professor : My Brother died of cancer even though he prayed to GOD to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But GOD didn't. How is this GOD good then? Hmm? (Student was silent) Professor : You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella. Is GOD Good? Student : Yes. Professor : Is Satan good? Student : No. Professor : Where does Satan come from? Student : From...GOD... Professor : That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this World? Student : Yes. Professor : Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And GOD did make everything. Correct? Student : Yes. Professor : So who created evil? (Student did not answer) Professor : Is there Sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the World, don't they? Student : Yes, sir. Professor : So, who created them? (Student had no answer) Professor : Science says you have 5 Senses you use to Identify and Observe the World around you. Tell me, son...have you ever seen GOD? Student : No, sir. Professor : Tell us if you have ever heard your GOD? Student : No, sir. Professor : Have you ever Felt your GOD, Tasted your GOD, Smelt your GOD? Have you ever had any Sensory Perception of GOD for that matter? Student : No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't. Professor : Yet you still believe in HIM? Student : Yes. Professor : According to Empirical, Testable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son? Student : Nothing. I only have my Faith. Professor : Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has. Student : Professor, is there such a thing as Heat? Professor : Yes. Student : And is there such a thing as Cold? Professor : Yes. Student : No, sir. There isn't... (The Lecture Theatre became very quiet with this turn of events) Student: Sir, you can have Lots of Heat, even More Heat, Superheat, Mega Heat, White Heat, a Little Heat or No Heat. But we don't have anything called Cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is No Heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as Cold. Cold is only a Word we use to describe the Absence of Heat. We cannot Measure Cold. Heat is Energy. Cold is Not the Opposite of Heat, sir, just the Absence of it. (There was pin-drop silence in the Lecture Theatre) Student : What about Darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as Darkness? Professor : Yes. What is Night if there isn't Darkness? Student : You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the Absence of Something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light... But if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and its called Darkness, isn't it? In reality, Darkness isn't. If it is, you would be able to make Darkness Darker, wouldn't you? Professor : So what is the point you are making, young man? Student : Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed. Professor : Flawed? Can you explain how? Student : Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a Good GOD and a Bad GOD. You are viewing the Concept of GOD as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can't even explain a Thought. It uses Electricity and Magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view Death as the Opposite of Life is to be ignorant of the fact that Death cannot exist as a Substantive Thing. Death is Not the Opposite of Life: just the Absence of it Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your Students that they evolved from a Monkey? Professor : If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes, of course, I do. Student : Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir? (The Professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going) Student : Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and Cannot even prove that this Process is an On-Going Endeavor, are you not teaching your Opinion, Sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher? (The Class was in uproar) Student : Is there anyone in the Class who has ever seen the Professor's brain? (The Class broke out into laughter) Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it?... No one appears to have done so. So, according to the Established Rules of Empirical, Stable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have No Brain, Sir. With all due respect, Sir, how do we then trust your lectures, Sir? (The Room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable) Professor : I guess you'll have to take them on Faith, son. Student : That is it sir...Exactly! The Link between Man & God is FAITH. That is all that Keeps Things Alive and Moving. NB: I believe you have enjoyed the Conversation....and if so... You'll probably want your friends/colleagues to enjoy the same... won't you? Forward this email to them to Increase their Knowledge...or FAITH. That student was ALBERT EINSTEIN.

Dato Ahmad Fuad Embi

MALAYSIA BOLEH!!!!!! THIS EXPLAINS HOW WE HAVE STUDENTS WITH 20 As. A GOOD ONE .... MUST READ.......n HAVE A GOOD LAUGH....!! Subject: A Very Wise View from Datuk Dr Agoes Salim... The objective of STPM is to pass people? How do you explain the fact that 87% of the students passed the exams of the Sijil Tinggi Persekolahan Malaysia (STPM) recently, when during your father's time only 10% would have passed? Are students getting smarter? Or are STPM questions getting easier? Let me put things in their proper perspective. During your grandfather's time, they would ask exam questions like: "In what year did Parameswara founded the kingdom of Melaka ?" The correct answer was "1402", and they found that only 10% of the students managed to answer the question correctly.. This didn't go down too well with the authorities, because the objective of the exams was to pass people. I mean, what's the point of having exams if people fail? So later, they found another way to ask the same question: "Parameswara founded the kingdom of Melaka in the year: (a) 2001 (b) 2004 (c) 1986 (d) 1975 (e) 1402 Tick the correct answer." The results were better in that 20% of the students passed. But it was still not good enough, so the authorities tried a different tactic a few years later. "Parameswara founded the kingdom of Melaka in the year 1402. True or false?" Well, half of the students guessed "True" and the other half guessed "False". Fully 50% passed. The results were getting pretty acceptable by now but still not good enough. Most other countries would be satisfied with a 50% passing rate, but not us. We are a better country, because we are a boleh country. The authorities then cracked their heads and then came out with this one: Read the following sentence carefully. "Parameswara, the cousin of Proton-Iswara, founded the kingdom of Melaka in the year 1402. Underline the name of the person who founded Melaka." 60% underlined "Parameswara", 30% underlined "Proton-Iswara" and 10% underlined "1402". Yeah!!!!....60% managed to pass! So krever! But for some reason, the authorities were still not contented. So last year, they came out with this gem: "One day in the year 1402, Parameswara founded the kingdom of Melaka . Then he went home to have dinner. What did he eat?" 13% (smart students) handed in blank answers, 57% wrote "Maggi Mee", 10% wrote " Kentucky ried Chicken" and 20% wrote "Nasi Lemak". The correct answer was anything concerning "Food" of course! After the marking was over, it was found that 87% of the students had passed. 87%!!!!!............now that's pretty impressive! So it's true. So now the authorities are very happy that the students are indeed getting smarter? Well done Boleh-land! Perhaps, this is why we have a host of students with an impressive string of 'As' who can hardly construct a decent sentence! Neow mind, our super-duper gomen can find a job for us one. Duh……

Blood Clots/Stroke - They Now Have a Fourth Indicator, the Tongue


I will continue to forward this every time it comes around!

STROKE:Remember the 1st Three Letters....S.T.R.

My nurse friend sent this and encouraged me to post it and spread the word.
I agree.

If everyone can remember something this simple, we could save some folks.
Seriously..

Please read:

STROKE IDENTIFICATION:

During a BBQ, a friend stumbled and took a little fall - she assured everyone that she was fine (they offered to call paramedics) .she said she had just tripped over a brick because of her new shoes.

They got her cleaned up and got her a new plate of food. While she appeared a bit shaken up, Ingrid went about enjoying herself the rest of the evening

Ingrid's husband called later telling everyone that his wife had been taken to the hospital - (at 6:00 PM Ingrid passed away.) She had suffered a stroke at the BBQ. Had they known how to identify the signs of a stroke, perhaps Ingrid would be with us today. Some don't die. they end up in a helpless, hopeless condition instead.

It only takes a minute to read this...

A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke...totally. He said the trick was getting a stroke recognized, diagnosed, and then getting the patient medically cared for within 3 hours, which is tough.

RECOGNIZING A STROKE

Thank God for the sense to remember the '3' steps, STR . Read and Learn!

Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately, the lack of awareness spells disaster. The stroke victim may suffer severe brain damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke.

Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions:

S *Ask the individual to SMILE.
T *Ask the person to TALK and SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE (Coherently)
(I.e. It is sunny out today.)
R *Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS..

If he or she has trouble with ANY ONE of these tasks, call emergency number immediately and describe the symptoms to the dispatcher.

New Sign of a Stroke -------- Stick out Your Tongue

NOTE: Another 'sign' of a stroke is this: Ask the person to 'stick' out his tongue.. If the tongue is 'crooked', if it goes to one side or the other, that is also an indication of a stroke.

A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this e-mail sends it to 10 people; you can bet that at least one life will be saved.

P R E F A C E

I created this blog just to pen down some observations, ideas, dreams, comments on matters affecting my day to day life. The points that will be written will merely be my personal opinion.

Cheers.